Mr Mascellani's Musings

Something That Annoys Me

I hate it when a person mentions what particular category a certain friends of theirs belongs to in order to appear 'cool' 'accepting' and 'liberal'.


E.g: " I had dinner with my gay friend, Steve, last night".
" I went to the movies with my friend, Helen, who SINGS IN THAT REALLY FAMOUS BAND".


And after the person finishes telling you about 'dinner with Steve' or about the 'movie with Helen'- all you can think, as I have already said, is that the only reason why the person mentioned that Steve is gay and that Helen sings in a famous band is in order to self-promote him/herself.

So, as that you might think, and perhaps, say:


"Wow! This person is Sooooooo cool, he/she has a gay friend and a friend who sings in a famous band."


But, fuck, how 'cool', 'accepting', and 'liberal' can be a person be if he/she divides his/her friends into categories in a lame attempt to appear to be anything but the banal non-entity (at best) or, the 'bigot in liberal's clothing (at worst) that he/she really is.


So, the next time you hear some one doing what I have just described; wait until they have finished speaking, and then say:


"This guy I sort of know, who's a bit a cunt himself, who is a nobody , called David, thinks that people like you are pretentious wanker arseholes."

Then proceed to poke that person in the eyes 'Mo' style.